Ok this is not about the famous Ray Bradury novel Something Wicked This Way Comes, although the infamous Dr. Dark just might make an appearance. Rather this is about BAD THINGS THAT ARE DUE. Yes NAAites everywhere, we are living on borrowed time. You see our friendly planet has a dark side.
If you listen closely to the rumbling of the earth, you just might hear Gaia say, “Nice planet you got there. It would be a shame if something were to happen to it.” Ok so maybe Gaia doesn’t exactly talk like she’s from New Jersey, but there are a lot of very bad things that could happen to earth that are high on the “overdue list.”
For all of you out there who just can’t wait to experience a post apocalyptic adventure, here are some of the things that just might bring that about. But be careful what you ask for … some of these are super nasty and Mel Gibson and Tina Turner might just not be there to provide the entertainment. And remember in some scenarios, you just might wind up in District 12.
MAGNETIC POLE REVERSAL
Ok so what’s so bad about a magnetic pole reversal? I just get out my compass and it will point south instead of North. Make a few software patches to my GPS and I am all set. WRONG. If the pole does reverse, and it is a mere 540,000 years OVERDUE, the magnetic fields will temporarily collapse (for up to 10,000 years) and radiation will pour in. This means that the earth will fry and you will likely get a very bad sunburn, go hungry and die. Just saying.
For a video on magnetic pole reversal, watch this:
For a thought provoking book on the subject, see below.
YELLOWSTONE SUPER VOLCANO
Ok for this one, you might have a shot at survival unless of cource you live somewhere between St Louis and Los Angeles, in which case you likely to be killed outright. For the rest of you, you can expect darkened skys’ for years, massive die-offs of crops and animals and a cold spell that will make you think you are stuck in a sort of groundhog day Grinch holiday. Burr … very bad stuff … but at least you would almost certainly have lots of white Christmases for the next couple of decades. If death and mass starvation are your thing, this ones for you.
Here is a video explaining the whole freaking disaster.
And here is a link for more on the topic.
MAJOR ASTEROID COLISION
65 million years ago, an asteroid about 10 miles across hit earth and wiped out the dinosaurs and just about everything else. Asteroids of this size hit earth about every 65 million years or so. What? Uh Oh. Not good. Yes that’s right. There is an asteroid out there in deep space about to suffer a major perturbation in it’s orbit. It is clearly marked “To whom it may concern.” Were it not for Jupiter sucking these things into it’s gravitational well, it would happen more often. Good old Jupiter … we luv ya. I wouldn’t worry much about this one however … you will see a flash and then feel nothing … for a very long time.
A NEW LITTLE ICE AGE
Want something a bit more imminent … something that will almost certainly happen during your lifetime?
OK then, I give you the bi-centennial solar minimum. This will be a period of super cold weather and will start somewhere around 2015 and bottom out somewhere around 2031. It’s another one of those mass starvation, food riots type events … so make sure you are well stocked with food and ammo. Oh yeah, let the Hunger games begin.
For those longing for a Maunder Minimum type cold event, watch this:
A NEW BIG ICE AGE
And for those who want more than just a little cold, I give you the coming Real Ice Age. We are currently in an interglacial warming period and these usually last about 10,000 years. The current one has lasted about 11,000 years so we are due. This is a woolly mammoth type event, so clone people get to work. Protein and fur definitely will be needed. In this flavor of disaster, ice will cover most of North America and New York City will be entombed in Ice. The Wizard predicts the Yankees will go south for spring training and never come back.
OK, the above is just a partial list of bad things that could happen. EMP blasts (real or man made,) plus a gamma-ray burst (link here), a takeover by skynet and a host of other nameless evils are all on the menu. Me I’m on a disaster diet so I won’t be selecting any of the above. Plus, I have sort of a hobbit’s view on adventure, so I really really prefer none of these things. For you seekers of Thunderdome, good luck … you will need it.